A Cancer Scare - A Blessing

Dear READER,


..........I guess the best place to start this post is by sharing one of my greatest fears. I have always had the fear of getting cancer and dieing. I don't know why that is like my worst fear but it has always been that way since I can remember.

While I was growing up my brother, any time he had a bump, scrap, scar anything he would point to it and dramatically say "It's Cancer" and start freaking out. He still does it today, it's become a really funny thing in my family were if anyone has anything wrong 'oh it must be cancer'. We don't seriously mean it but we just say it - thanks to my brother it's just something that is there.

On my mission one of my companions ended up having breast cancer while on her mission. I was so scared. She was not only my companion but had turned into my best friend. I can't exactly explain how I felt but It was not a pleasant feeling. The one thing I remember thinking was -- we are being so obedient, working so hard, how can this be happening? It wasn't even me but I was mad. Mad that this would happen to my best friend how could it. Everything turned out ok and she continued to serve a full and faithful mission.

At the beginning of this year I fell down some stairs. For most of you who know me, you are probably thinking that this is a perfectly normal thing to be happening to me. I fall up stairs, down stairs, down hills, walk into walls, and doors, and I trip almost everywhere. (Well I used to -- I haven't been as clumsy since my mission, I think I truly learned to walk while on my mission but it took a good month or so). Anyways I fell down this flight of stairs while I was babysitting and I really hurt myself. So much so that I considered going to see a doctor - that didn't last long as you will also know because I just hate doctors. I don't know why I just do and hospital are terrifying to me. So it was a quick and fleeting thought. So instead I went to a Chiropractor.

This Chiropractor took tons of x-rays and made sure I hadn't torn anything. The part of me that hurt the most are my right hip and left arm. He took extra care to take more x-rays of these two parts just to be sure. No broken bones, YEAH!!!!!

BUT

We ended up finding a black spot on my left arm near my elbow. It was about the size of tack. We sent the x-rays to a specialist who came back and asked that some more x-rays and test be taken. For those of you who don't know Black spots on bones are really Really REALLY bad. They are usually cancer and not a good thing to have. Not only was a pocked and pricked and tested but I was scared to death. My Chiropractor was there through the whole thing kind of acting like my Brother making me laugh and telling me oh it's probably cancer no big deal and saying it will hurt today but tomorrow it will be better. He really is a great guy....during the time my test were with the specialist I have had physical therapy three times a week trying to get things working and better.

Then the day finally came to meet with the specialist. A little short man with graying hair came in, and said ok well you're great. That was it, I was shocked and a bit taken back. What? 'The spot on your bone is actually tissue'. I had broken that same part of my bone twice before and apparently had chipped away some of the bone now there was some soft tissue there, which 'Naturally' would show up black on a x-ray because it's not bone.

I was so happy I could have cried. Ok so I did get a bit emotional but I didn't cry. I felt so blessed, there are no words to tell you how blessed I felt. I was standing on my metro the next day and saw this sign saying that in May there was going to be a walk here in D.C. for a cure for cancer. I had seen it a few times on the metro I mean I'm on it twice a day for 40 minutes of course I had seen it, read it, and ignored it. But on this particular day. My heart full of gratitude for being cancer free I read it, felt it in my heart, and made up my mind to do something about it. Long story short, MAY 4 I will be walking 26 miles for a cure.

I know this is getting really long but I do need to add just one more part to this story. I asked my family to keep me in their prayers as this was going on and especially on the day I went to see the specialist. I have never felt so much peace walking into a room knowing that the information could be really bad. It wasn't but it could of been - there are many who go into those rooms and who's lives are changed forever because they do have cancer. It made really appreciate those who are survivors and those who are struggling at this time with cancer. What great faith they must have. I hope that they all have family who are praying for them like mine did for me.

Take the time to day to say a little prayer for those who may be suffering at this time with cancer. If you know someone who had cancer take the time to call them and tell them you love them and believe in them.


Yours Truly,

Jenessa

Blessing of Technology

Dear READER,


This is going to be just a quick post but I wanted to let you know how grateful I am for technology. I know that sound a bit vain.

Let me tell you what technology was able to do for me just today.

- I was able to talk to my Dad who is thousands of miles away in a war zone.
- I was able to check emails at home (due to an ice rain storm)
- I was able to check my voicemail from the office on my cell phone.
- I was able to heat up my lunch in a microwave
- I was able to turn on heat in my apartment


I mean the list goes on an on. I am so grateful for modern technology and the blessings it can bring to our lives if used the right way.


Yours Truly,

Jenessa

NEW YEARS GOALS for 2013

Dear READER,

HAPPY NEW YEARS!!!!!!!! HAPPY NEW YEARS!!!!!!!!!! HAPPY NEW YEARS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wow 2013 is finally here and I don’t know if I’m ready for it, what the heck I am so ready for 2013. I am planning and setting goals and really determined to be well amazing. (We will get back to that word ‘amazing in a minute.) I hate how we all make goals for New Years and by the summer we’ve failed so we are thinking ‘ok by Christmas what can I accomplish?’ and ‘well I’ll just start on it next year’. I HATE that. So my very first goal of the New Year’s is to never give up on what my goals are…no matter how hard they are or how bad I might be doing at them.

As you might have already noticed I’m going to let you be a part of my goal setting this year for 2013. I am really excited for this year; this is going to be my year.

So before I list my goals I would like to tell you what my 2013 motto is. I actually got it from someone else but it hit me like a brick so I decided to use it. My motto for 2013 is…………………..Drum roll please……………………………………… “Expect Amazing!” It means knowing you can do it before you even start. Know that whatever I put my mind to will be fine, not just fine but amazing. It means that I need to believe in myself and what I can do because in the end it should be amazing. I can’t really put into words how it hit me and how it makes sense in my mind and heart but it’s what I’m going with. I’ve already printed it out and have it on the bathroom mirror, the fridge, the T.V. stand and in my office at work. It’s what I am aiming to be and do. So when you read my goals and thing I plan on doing this year, just know that I have Expect Amazing with each of them. So without any further delay and rambling on, here it is for 2013.

Be absolutely Amazing!!!!!!!!  The end, no I’m kidding sorry I just thought it was really funny J

-          Loose the weight. I have 70 lbs I would rather be without so this year is the year I say goodbye to it all. If you are my friend and if you are still reading at this point you much be my friend, you will understand that when I invite you to a Zumba class or say no to going out for lunch it’s not because I don’t love you or that I think you are fat. I just want to do something that doesn’t deal with food and that will be beneficial to me. I also just really love Zumba and think you should come.

-          I want to become a work out feen. I want to know how to work out and work out good and hard.

-          I am going to learn more about sports….especially football and soccer, but also basketball, baseball, hockey. I’d say more but I think for this year I will just focus on the major ones. Then next years (2014) move on to things like tennis, golf, and so on. HONESTLY we’ll have to see how far I get with this one, but I am expecting amazing so I’m going to know them and enjoy them.

-          I am starting my Graduate studies this summer for Event Planning. I am either going to get the certificate, or just the full out Degree or both. I don’t know but I will be starting in June.

-          I intend to get a bicycle. Yes a real one, that you use outside and everything. I would love to have a basket on it but that is optional. I want it because I live right next to the bay and this lovely path and I want to ride my bike on it.

-          In May I have a work meeting in Orlando Florida. It is one of our biggest meetings and I am fully in charge of it.  So after that I am spending three to five days in Disney World, which is going to be amazing.

-          I want to walk in a few events like the ‘walk for a cure’, and ‘walk for children something or other’. So I will be keeping my eye open for events like this and then I will be attending them.

-          I want to date. At least once a month go on a date with someone. Either him asking me or me asking him. But I am determined. I just now have to muster up the courage to do it.

-          I am planning and am determined to be in Germany for Christmas or actually week before Christmas. I have a jar full of coins to use for it and also got a bonus at work which will be going to it. SO I am really excited about it. It’s taken a long time to get there but I’m finally going to be there.

-          I am going to be able to pay off my Student Loans this year. Well my loans form BYU-Idaho. I don’t know about my graduate program as of it. I do know that my office pays $4,000 a year for school so that will help it will all just depend on what I do. BUT the BYU-Idaho school loans will be paid off YEAH!!!!

-          I want to come prepared for Church (having all the reading done and prepared with questions and such) every Sunday. This shouldn’t be a problem this year as I start this new schedule of Church from 3:00pm to 6:00pm (worst ever but that’s ok I will find the positive in it somehow and you will probably hear about it in post later on down the road.

-          I would like to start my Institute program, which will include starting, working on and graduating from institute. I believe it’s a four year program like seminary was but we shall see.

-          I want to attend cultural and festive events in the area. I want to never regret not going to something I could have or would have enjoyed if I would have just gotten out of the house and done it. This might include making new friends who will go with you to these kinds of things. (plays, musical concerts, festivals, and such)

-          I will/want to attend the temple twice a month. If not more….depending on the month and times and such. But at least twice a month I will be there.

-          One of my goals I will be working on and it includes my temple attendance, church participation, institute and my other scripture and spiritual goals is that I want to have the gospel in my bones. (I’ll explain this in a later post as it deserves one to the whole concept).

-          I want to get my family together twice a month for Family Home Evening via Skype. I would like to have them be on the Christlike attributes intermingles with the For Strength of Youth as that is where some of our family is. A month for a topic is a good start and will help us as we strive to be better at the attribute and concept.

-          I would like to know the girls better in my R.S. as the Visiting Teaching Coordinator; I want to magnify my calling to the best of my ability. So I want to get to know the girls by name and really work on know their needs and the needs of companions and so forth. I can’t help if I’m not willing to learn and know.

As I am reading through my list I find that I have more and more things come to mind. So I’m stopping before it becomes impossible. I hope your New Years was a good one. I pray that this year (2013) will be a wonderful one for you and you r loved ones.

Yours Truly,

Jenessa